Family day today!

Today we celebrated a birthday in our family. I had a really good time with my cousins this afternoon. I like it when I can get together with them and have a "good" time. Today was one of those. You can click on a pic to enlarge...I didn't want to make them big on here.

My niece Asasha was not very happy with me!

My brother....along with everyone else...showing off his OSU flip flops! (he had on OU sunglasses just for the record!!!!)

My Cousin Sarah, My cousin-in-law Yoana, and Me! Yoana is REALLY short! ;o)

Yoana and Me

My Cousin in law Nikki and me

My cousin Kenny and well....me

My Cousin Jeff...and again....me. (They look alike don't they) He is REALLY TALL!!!

My Brother Randy....WITH THE OU GLASSES ON! We won't discuss the shoes!

And of course....ME AND CHAD!


So thre we are! That's not everyone, but let's say....THE FUN ONES!

Question on Leadership

My friend Tim is posting questions on his blog each week. This one is about leadership....check it out! Feel free to comment! I thought it was interesting.

Patience

It's something I don't have a lot of. I guess I would have to say it depends on the situation.

I've been told I'm a very patient mother. I don't freak out of the littlest thing with my kids. I give probably far too many chances, but the fact is, I have good kids.

I've been told I'm a very patient wife. Sometimes I see this, then there are those other times! Probably when I've had a bad day or something.

I'm not a patient cook. Chad laughs at me as I don't set a timer. But yet, I keep getting up many times and trying to gauge is something is done. Then become frustrated when I can't figure out how long it has been in the oven. Guess it would be best to set the timer huh? I'm learning! ;o)

According to my PLACE assessment, I am a D personality. D's are not patient people. They like results...and they want them quick! Many times I catch myself growing inpatient and getting upset and it leads me nowhere! It's very frustrating. I think people who practice good patience are remarkable. These are the quiet ones that can wait on an answer forever without losing any peace, hope, or faith....or their patience! I would like to be one of those!

In Proverbs 19:11 it says: A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

Can I overlook an offense? Can I grow in my own wisdom and gain patience?

There is good news.....I think I can.

Encouragement

I really like Paul. He was such a great encourager to his friends. He wanted to make sure that he sent the proper message and proved that Jesus loved them. Sometimes we forget just how much Jesus loves us. It's easy to sing the song, but can we honestly grasp the magnitude of how much love He has for each of us. Paul proves to be the ultimate encourager as he noticed the following things in the Thessalonians.....

You became imitators of us and of the Lord. (1:6)

You welcomed the message with joy. (1:6)

You became a model to all believers. (1:7)

Your faith in God has become known everywhere. (1:8)

You turned to God from idols. (1:9)

You serve the living and true God. (1:9)

You are waiting for His Son, Jesus, to return from heaven. (1:10)

Wow! I would love for my friends to notice these things in me and share them with me. Can we learn from Paul??? I try as much as possible to be a great encourager to everyone I meet and let them know what I see in them. I hope that I have been able to accomplish some of this and by my encouragement to them and I hope they know how much Jesus loves them and what awaits for us in the Kingdom.

Do you need a reminder? Who can you encourage today and remind them of God's love?
I know....I have a list that need encouragement...and I'll start that now.
Have a blessed day!

How time flies!

Ian will be turning 13 on Tuesday. Can't really believe it. We celebrated today with a pool party! We had so much fun!




Theresa came over to party with us!


It took a few moments to get this shot! How do you like Chad's beard?? Hee hee


I've been told I give the "Look of Death" I wonder if Theresa captured it here.


Well...this was just precious. Ethan decided he needed a nap! He played so hard! What you can't see is that I'm texting around him. It was priceless!

Weekend In Nashville = Priceless!

I have so much to say but have no words about our trip to Nashville. AMAZING! Even while there I found myself speechless many times. I believe it was the opportunity to take in the moment and enjoy what God was offering me.

It was a very relaxing trip, but yet....it was a lot of work too. Thursday night leading worship was just truly an awesome experience. There is nothing more that I love than to worship with others who love the Lord so much. To see their faces and hear their voices praising His name brings my heart so much joy. I love that other people love Him like I do.


I am excited to be back home tonight. It's hard getting back to the normal routine when you are so pumped up about Him! Praise God for making all things possible!

Hit the road Jack....

Couldn't think of a more clever title!

Heading to Nashville in the morning. I'm so excited for the trip. Even more than that.....I'm excited to spend time with the people I love so much from church. I love trips like this because it draws you closer together. It must be the 20 hours in a van that does it. ;o)

Pray for our trip, our travels, and that we are like Jesus to everyone we meet.

See ya in a week!

Compliments....

There is nothing that makes me feel better than a great compliment. Some people have trouble giving great compliments, and others, are getting better at it;o) But that's for another blog.

This one's about my kids!

Sunday's have always been difficult days. The kids don't want to go to church and complain about class, and church is boring, and yadda yadda yadda. We go to church...it's what we do. End of story!

Last Wednesday, L & E really didn't want to go to class at all. But after a few eye rolls and huffing and puffing, they trotted along. All was well when they got out.

Ian struggles on Sunday's and I haven't figured it out yet. Sometimes it takes a little more effort on my part of looking into why he's feeling out of place rather than just assuming what's going on.

So THIS Sunday....we're sitting in class and Linda comes up behind us and just wants us to know how great L & E were in class last Wednesday and explained to us why they would be helping her during service today. I know I had a look of shock on my face! But I was SOOOO delighted! I couldn't wait to give them praises!

Then...I'm talking to Bobby and he tells me how great Ian is doing in the youth group and how much growth he has seen in him over the past year. I think my head must have spun around 5 times at that moment. But again...I was delighted!

I have great kids!!!! They can frustrate me and delight me all in the same day and sometimes within the same 5 minutes. But there's nothing better to a parent than someone coming up when you're having a day that you struggle with parenting....and compliment your children. That....feels like happiness!!!!

Just Stuff....

We went to see Phantom of the Opera last night and I had the best time! I had a headache so it did make the night a bit uncomfortable but it was worth every moment and every penny we spent on going. We went with the best group of people I could ever want to spend an evening with. I hope we can do it more often.

We leave Wednesday morning for Nashville. I'm so excited. But yet....I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO! Not only do I have to get ready, but I have to get Ian's birthday party planned for Sunday afternoon. So I have to have everything done by Tuesday and I still am up to my ears in errands.

It's okay though. If it doesn't get done then that's okay. The world will not end. The celebrations will go on. And fun will be had by all. I get overwhelmed when I have about 5 list of things to do in just a few days, but at some point, I'm going to come up and take a breath of air. ;O)

Being still

Have you ever wanted to blog and you just couldn't? Very few times in my life am I left just speechless. Doesn't mean I don't have anything to say, or things going through my mind, but...I think it's God's way of helping us keep our focus on Him. Times like right now, I am forced to just be still....and know...He's God.

Things he did....

My dad is an interesting man in many ways. Last night I was reflecting on some of the fun things he did when I was just a kid.

*On Valentines day, he always took a red sheet of construction paper...made a BIG heart on it....and listed out all the things he loved about us. My favorite line was "I love how you keep your bedroom clean" That was far from the truth...but I took the hint!

*While I was in campfire, we had a "father/daughter" banquet every year. He wore this blue suit that I can always remember. We're not talking dark blue...but yes...baby blue. He always made jokes and made everyone laugh and was also great at winning Bingo every year.

*He played guitar and sang silly songs to me that he wrote. I think I get my sense of humor from him and definitely my musical side. There's this song that sticks in my head "Does a chicken have lips" and then it goes downhill from there. Every year when our families gather together, someone always has to break out with this song and everyone else joins in. It's pretty funny cause the song makes NO sense. We both love music...but as we've gotten older, our differences in music have changed quite a bit.
He also sang a song about some mountain and a dad and his daughter. I don't remember the name, but the tune is still in my head today.

*Every year, a few weeks before Christmas, he would go out and buy me the prettiest Christmas dress. You know...the frilly one with tons of lace and made me look like a million dollar princess. I never knew what I would get, but I always anticipated the Christmas dress. No other gift really mattered to me.

*He's a whistler. Everyday coming home...he would never say hello first. He would be whistling a happy tune as he walked through the door. My mom always said he did that so he wouldn't scare us and we would know it was him walking through the door. I knew he did it because he loved to just whistle. He did it everywhere we went.

*He's a great joke teller. Still to this day he loves a good joke. Can't say they are always "clean" jokes, but they are pretty funny. He loves a good story that will make others laugh.

*He always drove us around town at night. Around dusk, at least 3 nights a week, we would drive over to the tasty freeze on 11th street and get a chocolate dip cone. Then we would just drive around the city. Sometimes paying bills so he could save a stamp, but most of the time, just listening to the radio and looking at the sights. We never went farther than 51st street, but we spent hours in the car growing up.

*Vacations were always fun. Even if for a kid they were boring, he made them fun. They were always road trips with my brother and I constantly fighting about silly little things. Probably because we owned an ORANGE car!
I road my first upside down roller coaster with my dad and I remember his huge arm coming across my chest as he thought I was going to fall out! I was so little I came out of the seat. I remember that he would have never road anything like that, but I really wanted to and he wasn't going to let me down.

Memories like these are fun. I have many more as I sit here and think about it but the blog is long enough. Things change as life goes on so I think it's important to stop and remember the good times that you've experienced together. My dad won't be around forever, and at times, our relationship is rough. More than I would like it to be. But it's never changed my heart and how much I really love him. I may never hear those words from him, and he's not always been the best at saying it, but somewhere deep inside, I believe he does.

Varities

I LOVE a good sandwich! Growing up I remember every Sunday night after church (yes...Sunday night church) we had Campbell's soup and sandwiches. I remember the smell and remember my mom opening the can of chicken noodle that I couldn't wait to eat. I always wondered why she bought so many cans when we went to the store. Now I know...that little bit, doesn't go very far.

I've often been complimented on the varities that I have chosen to make for my family and friends over the years. Most of my friends know they can come over anytime for a good sandwhich...or a loaded baked potato!

So today for lunch, we enjoyed some of my finest with what we had in the fridge. Ham, Mayo, Lettuce, Tomato (without salmonella), pickles, white bread, salt and pepper. Sounds pretty simple...but maybe it's in the bread...but whatever it is...it is simple and good on a summer day. Lukus chose to eat the traditional PB&J and that's okay. Apparently when mom makes it....it's pretty good.

The sandwich...it's a simple little thing. I don't really know what makes it so special...or so good....but most people enjoy them and they bring a smile to their face. Maybe it's the fact that it's easy....or then again...maybe it's that good memory from home that just hits you right every time.

What's your favorite sandwich??

Conversations with Lukus...

Lukus: You know you can get baptized in HOLY WATER???

Mom: Really? What makes the water Holy?

Lukus: Because they stood over it and sang "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY"

Pinball Number Count

I have to confess something....I never watched Sesame Street as a child. My children did not either. So I guess I can't appreciate the true value of the show. However, there are some out there that have some favorite things about it. One of them being this song below. I can see why. It's pretty catchy!

Reasons....

Reasons not to work an insane amount of hours in 3 days:

* You get absolutely no sleep

* You miss getting to be with your kids.

* After a while, you start to see things that are not there.

* It puts a strain on your 5 senses.

* It adds stress to your heart.

* You eat at hours of the night that you usually don't.

*It puts a strain on your marriage.

*There's no possible way that everything will ever get done...so you might as well try to rest.

30 hours worked....in 36 hours....not enough sleep.

Pretty Blog!

Thanks Theresa!!! You make me smile!

Enjoying a night out!

Okay, so Chad and I love to have romantic nights out. HOWEVER, we do have children! But the funny thing is, our kids love to see that side of us. Guess they want to know that we are still "in love". So tonight, we went down to the river and then out to dinner. We had a fabulous time, even with them there! Here are a few highlights! (*disclaimer: the best part of the above photo was not exactly the OU shirt)

Emilie is getting great in her photography skills! She shot this one in the dark on the bridge while the wind was blowing!

I have no idea on earth what this was about. I heard "Hey take our picture" and then here ya go. I didn't even notice the dew bottle until I got home and laughed uncontrollably!

What you don't see in the backgroud is Emilie is sitting on the ledge praying not to fall in the water. We didn't hold this pose for very long!

Toe Pick

I can say now the secret is out. (Thanks to my mother) The kids now know about my ice skating days. So we had an afternoon of "dress up" as Emilie now decides she wants to follow in my footsteps! Yikes!

I think I must have worn this outfit when I was about 8 or 9. I can't remember. Of course...the skates were my last pair so they didn't fit her.

This was the team USA jacket for the 1992 winter olympics in Albertville, France. I have pants to match too, but we were just playing with the jacket.

The last moment was a photo opportunity caught by Lukus as we were playing. He's always willing to jump in and take some candid moments! Notice that HIGH arch in my foot??? I got that from wearing those skates! Ouch!

Conversations with Lukus...

Lukus: Oh my goodness....my stomach hurts like a rock!

Mom: HUH??? A rock hurts???

Lukus: Want me to hit you with a rock and see?

Mom: Nevermind!

screwed up!

One thing I find fascinating is that we are all messed up in some way or another.
We all have faults. We all hurt people. We are all sinners. I find this fascinating. Mostly because there are people in this world that would rather find fault within others, than look at themselves.
I have no place in my life to ever judge anyone for mistakes they have done in life. I make mistakes everyday.
Judgement is such a strange word. Judging goes so many different ways.

My biggest judgement against others is I judge what others may think of ME before giving them a chance to think of me. I don't expose my life for fear of judgement. So really I'm judging them and their reaction before they have a chance to form an opinion of me. That's only hurting me.

I believe I'm not the only one who does this. What about the person that judges the visitor who comes to church dressed in a provocative manner? What about the homeless man on the side of the road begging for money or food. What about the couple in church divorcing and everyone judging without knowing the whole story? What about a teen who comes to church pregnant? What about the member who got caught in a lie? What about the gay man or woman? What about....what about...what about. It could go on and on.

I can't judge these people because I did not die on a cross. But because of His death and resurrection He has empowered me to teach His word and to help those that are in need of help. It is not about creating division. It is not about choosing sides. It is not about denying anyone but it is about love. We are required by His law and his commandments to love one another.

We are accountable to God for our actions. I belive as fellow brothers and sisters that we too are to help each other with accountability for our actions. Reminders of how our actions are affecting others and how we as a family can help those that are truly in need.

We have such a hurting nation. Our loved ones and those we don't even know about are crying out and need a helping hand. How can we help today? Can we admit we are just as screwed up as the others? Is one sin far greater than another? Do we sin just by our omission to admit that we sin in the first place? It's one thing to say
"I'm a sinner" it'a another thing to be big enough to share it with the world.

I want to be that person!

The More I Seek You...

The more i seek you,
The more i find you
The more i find you,
The more I love you

I wanna sit at your feet
Drink from the cup in your hand.
Lay back against you and breathe, here your heart beat
This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.
I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming

Click on it to hear it on the left!

Deeper moments...

I want to blog....but don't know what to say.
I have so much to say and no way to get it out. Blogging it would not be beneficial.

This is where prayer is so beneficial. I can speak softly, cry, yell, or not speak at all and God knows the throughts that go through my head. He's the only one that matters. We sing songs like "When we all get to Heaven"..."Everybody will be happy over there"..."Paradise Valley"..."Heaven Came Down"..."I walk with the King"..."He still came"....just to name a few. And so many times I pray "Please God, hurry up...I'm waiting" I'm ready for the day that we can spend eternal life with Him.

But while I'm here, I love that we sing songs like "His Grace Reaches Me"

All else....doesn't matter.

Moments at the park

My kids just don't really like going to the park for the toys. They go for the nature! I love it!

Hold On!

I have several friends who are facing trials in life right now. My heart aches for them. It's hard not to carry their burdens for them.
If you have not heard this song, it's worth listening to.

Superhero Faith???

I am not a super hero. But I know one! His name is Jesus.

I believe in Him enough to live by faith and love Him regardless of the outcome.
Sometimes it's difficult to see the results of an answered prayer. Then again, sometimes it obvious.

My faith in God has grown by 110% over the past 10 years. I watch some of my dreams explode into reality and I've watched some of my dreams fall and crumble. We are all dreamers. I believe that God gives us dreams to make them a reality so that we can see His work in our lives and that we may be a witness to others.

What does God want from me in regards to my faith? I think God wants me to step out on the water and believe that I won't sink! Do I believe that can happen to me??? It already has! As I look back over my life, not once did he ever let me sink! I know I have experienced things, and I know that I have had rough times, but I'm still here. I'm still experiencing life, experiencing love, experiencing happiness, experiencing faith, and experiencing HIM!

If I have faith....what is there to be afraid of?
If I have faith.... I will be healed.
If I have faith....then I am forgiven!
If I have faith....then I am saved!
If I have faith....I stand in great assurance!
If I share my faith....others may have a glimpse of what our God can do!
Whether big or small....my faith will be enough to harvest the land

When we have nothing else in life, we have our faith in Jesus Christ.

Whatever you do, whatever happens, whatever life trows at you, know it's in the plans and take that first step of walking on water. It can be done with just a small amount of faith.

Philemon 1:4-6

Thanksgiving and Prayer
I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, 5because I hear about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints. I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ.

The poll is closed

When I post a poll, I will eventually tell you why! I run my dishwasher at least 3 times a day. Now one would think that I have a very small dishwasher, but in fact, it is one of the larger ones. We just use A LOT of dishes. One thing we made a commitment to do is eat out less. The bad thing is, you really use a lot of dishes when cooking. You've got your pots and pans, the dishes you cook with, then eat with, and we pertty much have dessert every night with our meals. (That's the kids favorite part)
I bake something nearly every day so I am pretty much in the kitchen all day! I try to do my cooking in the morning so that I have the rest of the day to have fun. Someday's it works, others...not so much. But I enjoy what I do!
There ya go!

Introducing Jesus by Steve Harvey

Another day...another appointment...

I had my doctors appointment this morning. It was okay. I have many mixed feelings. I sat alone in the room for quite a while before he came in. I had time to rehearse the things I wanted to say over and over in my head. Many times, my mind wandered as the ticking of the second hand from the clock hanging on the wall sounded more like a snare drum as it moved around in circles. I refocused just in time for him to walk in.

"How ya feeling?" he asked! That's a question I hate to ask my patients let alone answer as well. You can't really say "I'm great" when you're not. But over & over in my head, I know he doesn't want to hear that. They want to hear that the surgery went well and you are doing fantastic!!!

"I still have pain" I said. He didn't smile but showed concern. Said it's normal, it's only been 4 weeks....it could take up to 6 months!

You know, I could really let this get me down, but I'm not. I could choose to stay depressed, but I'm not. I feel so blessed to have my health, to be alive, to have 3 wonderful children and the most amazing husband in the world. I have a great family and a whole host of friends that I can count on. I really am blessed.

I spoke to the doctor about what happens if choose not to go through with the next surgery. He gave me the option to wait a while, but if the pain gets too bad, then I must go back in. He wasn't in favor of my decision, but then again, he was willing to work with me on it. He understood my desires, told me we are not dealing with a life or death issue, and is willing to accommodate my needs at this point.

I will go back to work this week and I am ready to jump in with everything I've got. I'm so excited to be working again. Not only because financially we need it, but because I am passionate about what I do.

I continue to pray daily that the health issues I do have will go away and that I will be completely healed from eveything. It's not in me to believe that God can't and won't do it. I believe that with everything I have, He can!

Pray it away....

You know when you have those days where you want to blog something but you just don't know where to start? Today is one of those days.

I sit here in the quiet. I hear the sounds of lawn mowers outside (which reminds me that the lawn needs mowed)...I hear an ambulance go by (which reminds me I need to work)but most of all I hear nothing. It's a sound that I love. A quiet peaceful nothing. However, in the 'nothing' you can hear so much.

I find myself in times like this asking lots of questions. I pray, I cry, I read, I do many things to reflect, and all by myself. It's really a cleansing feeling. Probably doesn't make any sense at all.

My thoughts have been focused around my healing and recovery lately. I am lost. I don't know what to do....but....the option I am leaning towards isn't flattering anyone right now. I question as to why?

I'm considering not going through with the second surgery. Can't I just pray it away? Doesn't that work? Shouldn't I believe that it WILL work? So many times we read of miracle's happening so why couldn't I be one of those? I could!

The part I come to is the part in my mind where the doctor tells me it's a must.
How long do I wait??? I honestly don't want to do this again. If it comes down to it, and I have the surgery, will I assume I didn't get a miracle? I just can't think that way. What if my miracle was them finding out now that I needed the surgery before it got too bad? All great questions, and only one person can give me the answers.

Has it been bad? Yes. Have I allowed others to see that? Not to my knowledge. Could it have been worse? Yes. Have I prayed? More than ever. Have others prayed? More than I imagine!

If God wants me to go through with it again, then I pray that those answers will be very clear to me on Tuesday at the doctor appointment. I pray that he gives me very clear direction on what to do, where to go, what to say, what questions to ask, and give me very clear answers. I pray he send me a burning bush and make it bright so that I can see clearly what it is I am supposed to do.

I found a bug!

Yes I did! A roach no less! This pesky creature found someway into my house without my permission. This was an unwelcomed guest!

I am not a fan of them, I don't like being around them, but have a problem with killing them and throwing them away. It's just gross!

So what did I do??? I decided to scoop it up and put it in the toilet!

Well, little did I know, these creatures can SWIM!

After several attempts to flush this thing, I was discouraged...and quite frankly...I was frightened that I may never be able to use this toilet again! This bug will not go away!!!

Finally, I took the plunger and forced it to go with the current and now this bug is swimming in the bug ocean.

The toilet is now clean and back in use. But it was touch and go for a while.

Painkillers...again!

Really I did it to myself this time!!!! ;o)

I have nothing to complain about really. I was so excited that I was released from bed rest on Friday that I did everything I could. Sure...I moved about slowly, but it was SO nice to get out of the house.

Saturday Chad and I decided to head up to Bentonville to pay a visit to our friends there. We had such a great time laughing, grilling, and just being plain silly. That's how you know you are great friends! You can laugh together and cry together and nobody thinks anything different of you. The ride in the car to Bentonville was not bad at all, but the coming home part, was much more of a challenge for me.

I managed to get enough sleep that night but only to wake up with the most horrible stiff neck. I don't know if it was the way I slept or the trip itself that caused that. But I will say, it just hurts.

Church this morning was amazing as I watched the parents bless their seniors off into the world. I look forward to the day that my children will grow to be adults and I look forward to them growing in the kingdom and doing kingdom work for the glory of God. They make me proud!

This afternoon, Chad took the boys fishing and Emilie and I went out with Theresa for pedicures and dinner. We had a great time and Emilie is just as precious as always.

After all that fun was over Theresa and I (with our husbands blessings) decided to take up an invitation from some of the ladies at church to go out to a movie. We saw "Made of Honor" and yes...it is a total chick flick but a nice feel good movie that was very funny.

I had an amazing time this weekend, but have to admit, have caused myself much pain that started before the movie, and now require more pain killers! Ah! Well, guess I can't always have so much fun huh?

Things....

Something I never thought I would hear Chad call and say:

"We have over 4000 rollover minutes...TALK IT UP"

In other news:

I just finished writing 3 letters to soldiers in Iraq. Don't know them at all, but it felt really good to write and encourage someone I don't even know that is fighting for not only our country, but for me and my family.

Be an encourager today! Encourage people you do know...as well as those you don't know. You never know where it may lead someday.

Yay for tomorrow!

I don't care what it takes...tomorrow I am getting in the car and driving. Don't know where I will go, or what I will do, but I'm getting out of the house! ;o)
I may use up a whole tank of gas just because I can!

I, like many others, have finished reading "The Shack". If you have not read it yet and want a closer walk with God, it's an amazing book. I struggle talking to God as if he were an actual human sitting here with me. This book has helped me in my faith walk. It's also helped me learn about living in the present and not looking back at the past and don't try to predict the future. It's truly an amazing book.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from the book:

"If anything matters then everything matters. Because you are important, everything you do is important. Every time you forgive, the universe changes; every time you reach out and touch a heart or a life, the world changes; with every kindness and service, seen or unseen, my purposes are accomplished and nothing will ever be the same again." Isn't that wonderful? It makes living as a part of the body of Christ sound personal and fun and possible in everyday life."


"just because I work incredible good out of unspeakable tragedies doesn't mean I orchestrate the tragedies..."

"Grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colors."

"When I dwell with you, I do so in the present-I live in the present. not the past, although much can be remembered and learned by looking back, but only for a visit, not an extended stay. I do not dwell in the future you visualize or imagine"

2 Weeks or 14 days!!!

It's all the same no matter how you look at it.

2 weeks from today I go back to the doctor and I CAN'T WAIT!

Holy cow...this has been the longest recovery in the world! Okay, not really, but it just seems that way.

Tonight I really get out of the house for the first time. I am going to attempt to go and sit through Ian's first band concert. I'm so excited to get out that I have already put on makeup and fixed my hair and it's not for another 6 hours. But it made me feel good to just get up and do that.

I made a commitment to get out and walk starting yesterday. Even if it were for a short distance. I did not make it out of the house but I will count this evening double. (I know...I wouldn't let that slide with one of my own patients!) :o)

I miss doing my everyday normal things. I miss going to church. I miss having the freedom of leaving the house. I miss playing with the kids. Although, they have been really good about not jumping on me lately. So many things I wish I could do but haven't been able to. Makes me very thankful that this setback is only tempoarary.

So here's my daily schedule right now:
7:30am wake up and walk downstairs
8:00 fall back asleep on couch
10:00 wake again, finally eat something
10:30 go back to sleep
12:30 wake up and take a shower
1:00 watch absolutely nothing good on TV
2:00 lay back down
3:30 2 kids get home
4:30 Ian gets home
Everyone makes their own dinner (yay)
From then on...more TV
after 7:00 I'm usually pretty tired now.
10 or 11 go to bed just so I can't fall asleep!
It's very frustrating!

Fabulous Mother's Day!

Yay for Mother's day!

I feel so blessed today!

My morning started off a little rough because I didn't get a good nights rest. I was trying to be brave and get out of the house for a moment on Saturday night and it was a little too much. What seemed like VERY LITTLE too me seemed like EVERYTHING to my body. So last night's sleep was not very slumber!

Chad and the kids woke up and headed off to church. When they came back home they had a handfull of gifts!
I have an entire collection now of Bath and Body stuff that I absolutely love! There is not a better gift for me than something from Bath and Body Works!
Then, Emilie hands me all these cards from her class and the KPC's from church wishing me a happy mother's day and get well wishes. HOW CUTE!!! Again...not expected but a nice surprise.

Shane and Alice joined us for lunch. Wait! Scratch that! THEY COOKED US LUNCH ON OUR GRILL!!! And it was very tastey! This is our first cookout of the year and I couldn't think of anyone better to spend it with. They stayed most of the afternoon and kept me company. I have to tell it all though, Shane did play Dance Dance Revolution with Ian. Not once...but many times! I didn't go and watch, but I could hear it from the other room, and he sounded pretty good!

My parents came over for a light dinner and desert and just headed out the door. I feel so blessed by my family and friends. They have been so good to me.

My plan this week is to try to increase my activity a little each day so that when Friday comes around, I will be able to drive again and hopefully by then, all the pain and side effects will be to a minimum. But as for now, I am still taking it easy as I don't want to make things worse. I'm ready to get better now!

What a difference

What a difference a day, an hour, or a minute can make.

Yesterday was fabulous! The morning started off great and I felt in great spirits. In the afternoon, Shane stopped by to deliver me a DVD if last Sunday's sermon that I could not wait to watch. The kids came home, everyone was in a good mood and all was great. Then all of a sudden things changed. I don't know the dynamic of what made the change but it knocked me down the rest of the night. Theresa called from Praise Team and I have to say, that was emotionally moving. Even through the phone, they sound AMAZING!!!! I was really excited to be able to hear them sing and oh how beautiful it was!
Theresa came by to visit and I had to take my meds while she was here. I was feeling pretty bad. But by the time she left, everything was funny again! ;o)

Kids!!

Kids are so funny!!!

My mom called from school and said:

"You need to monitor the things your daughter brings to school!"

I was in shock! "Oh no...what did she do???"

Mom said "This is teacher appreciation week and she brought a homemade card to her teacher Mrs. Potter"

I said "Yes...I know....what's wrong with that"

"She addressed it to Mrs. Pooter!"

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

Top That!!!!

I have to say that the Yeats win the award!!!! Tonight when my dinner was delivered...not only did they stay aroundfor half an hour, but they brought a whole host of jokes with them. I loved Hunters reaction to the "inappropriate" jokes!!! This family made me laugh tonight. Poor St. Peter! I love how he showed up in a lot of the jokes.

All my meals have been wonderful....all my host have been wonderful...and I have been so blessed!!!!

Today was a rather good day, but tonight I'm a bit worn out. But the day went by fast and I'm so thankful!

Things I've learned....

Since my days consist of laying on the couch, I don't have a lot of interesting things to say.

I have learned that TV is very boring but there are really some very good shows out there for the family though. I still love the classics like Happy Days and The Andy Griffith Show.

I asked Emilie what she wants to be when she grows up and she said:
"An old lady that lives under a bridge"
I'm glad she sets her standards pretty high.

Around 5:00 I looked over at Emilie and I said "I Love You"
She just rolled her eyes. So I said it again, and again, and again...and told her I wouldn't stop until she said it back. So she says:
"MOOOOOMMMMMM! I'll say it at midnight"
I said: "You'll be asleep"
She responds: "Exactly"

I've learned that pain killers bring on some of the most horrible nightmares! Not fun!

I think Chad is living it up driving my car these days!

Chad is doing an AMAZING job at keeping the house clean, dishes clean, and laundry done. Not to mention getting the kids off to school daily and making sure everything is done. Even running all the little silly errands I do 100 times a day! YAY CHAD!

I've learned that I really miss home cooked meals!

Recovery

Today is the 5th day post op. Bedrest is for the birds! I have slept enough for the rest of the year. Or maybe I have slept enough for all the sleep I have lost. Who knows. My medication keeps me groggy and down all the time so that's not really fun. I finally started to eat a little yesterday. I haven't felt like eating since the surgery.

I feel so blessed to have many friends that came by to visit and those that still call just to carry on a conversation so I don't get bored. I may not have anything interesting to talk about, so it's fun to have others call me and tell me something funny so I can laugh. I think laughter is the best medicine. So anyone with good jokes or funny stories...feel free to send them my way! Or call me! I love to hear from you.

The food that has been brought by has been wonderful. The generosity is wonderful. I wish people would stay and visit. Being here gets pretty lonely. You can only read so much...you can only watch TV so much. After a while, everyone needs that human touch, a hug, some laughter, etc.

So, this is my boring blog. Not much to say. Just needing something different to do.

Precious!!!

Asasha London!!! 7lbs 4oz 19 in

It was a long day, but well worth it!


This is me and my brother Randy. And Asasha of course!

She didn't cry much, but when she did, it was so cute!

She couldn't get warm so this is how her first hour was spent.

She is perfect!!!

Disney Spectacular

Concentrate on Life....not the other!

Today has just been BUSY!!!

I started with my final visit to my doctor. He is such a great man. We went over everything for the surgery and talked about some of my fears as well. (most I probably wouldn't have if I didn't work there)
If that visit wasn't long enough and depressing enough, I just spent 2.5 hours at the hospital getting everything ready, filling out paperwork, drawing blood, blood, and more blood, watching videos (not recommended) and just really being plum scared out of my mind.

It's so funny! I really do talk a good talk. When at work...it's all work and there aren't a whole lot of emotions tied to it. But when I become the patient, it's a totally different ballgame. So that bravery that I have when I'm "on the job" is now out the window. I am completely scared out of my mind!

The hospital has been great and has agreed to fulfill all my request! I've hit no snags at this point. Other than my emotions.

Here's the thing....you go into these situations and what's the thing you concentrate on??? Death! I'll just say it because it's out there! Death is on my mind. I would like to say that I am not scared to die...but when in fact. I am!
Or...is it that I am afraid of what I leave behind???

Concentrating on life would be so much more beneficial than concentrating on death. I try to live life abundantly and hope that in everything I do, I'm doing it to glorify God. Okay...now reality is...I know that doesn't happen. I'm a sinner!
Looking at life overall if we lived everyday like it were truly our last, our outcomes would be so different. Would we do more with our kids? Would we worry less about money? Would we say I love you more? Would I forgive more? What would you do that is different? Do you truly beleive that you live today like it is your last?
When I tend to whine and complain about things, this is where my mind goes. Is it necessary for me to be upset and complain....because really....if it were my last day, would it even matter?

I'm so excited to live life! I choose life! I choose to be happy! I choose to rejoice! Even though at times....I choose to be scared, I then choose to trust!

It's all perspective really! What will you choose to do in your life today!

Make it count!
Make a difference!
Make a change!
Make it about Him!

Nothing else really matters!

happenings....

This morning was really interesting as I sat down and filled out my living will. The hospital called yesterday and through our conversation she began to ask me my wishes and so forth. I finally just said, "I'll fill out the will and bring it tomorrow."
The living will is an interesting paper to fill out. You don't really think of these things until you have to. I always said, "Oh...I'll just let Chad make whatever decision" but then it dawned on me, he may not want to have to make that decision. So, now he won't have to. It's all in writing and finished.

Onto better news, I have felt really good the past 3 days. I'm not saying there isn't any pain as there surely is, but part of the pain has taken a vacation for the past few days. So much so that I haven't taken any pain meds since Saturday. Whoo Hoo! Quick movements and standing straight up tends to be the most painful, but even last night at church was good. Makes me feel good to have good days. 6 more days until the surgery and then it's all downhill after that. Today and tomorrow consist of me getting everything in order with the hospital and doctor so I can use Monday and Tuesday to rest and relax.

UNLESS....
My sister-in-law just called me and said that she is dilated to a 4 and cervix are soft! WHOO HOO!!!! I have prayed and prayed that my new niece Asasha London will arrive before I have to go into the hospital. Jessica has been in pre-term labor for the past 10 days and they have now given her the go ahead! If this baby comes...they are not stopping it! I pray for great health...and for her to be born before next Tuesday!!! (selfish...yes...I know ;o)

KPC's 2008

You just gotta love these kiddos. Thank you Theresa for the picture!!!

Question???

If you do something for yourself that involves nobody else, makes you feel better, nobody else can benefit from it, you not changing anything, and the only person that can be gratified is you....is that selfish???

I made a comment the other day that I thought triathalons were selfish sports. I feel bad when Chad goes and I don't go to support him. But...when I'm there, I just sit. I can't watch him, see him, root for him, but just sit and wait for him to finish. So I just ride there with him, and come home with him. It's not like football where you are part of a team and you cheer them on. You drop them off and don't see them again until it's over. It's a little boring.
So, my comment about it being a selfish sport came from the fact that you only do this for yourself. You only race against a clock. You don't speak to anyone, compete with anyone, create a bond with anyone, support anyone...you are just in it for yourself.

Am I wrong??? Don't need to be right....but still feel bad about my feelings.

Uncharted Territory!

I've been looking into my options for when school starts again in the fall. I have several on the table at the moment. However, the one that is becoming promising is not my most favorite. You see, their colors are a color that I am not fond of. But yet, I have all the program requirements to start today. They have one more letter in their name than I am use to saying, but acceptance looks like a piece of cake. The drive time is about 45 minutes, but might be worth the trip.

Oh my friends, can you even guess what this university is???

Yep...it's a God thing!

Today I was approaching the checkout line at the grocery store. I began to put my things on the belt as I noticed the woman in front of me. She was apparetly poor as you could tell by her dress, hygiene, and well, you could just tell.

I noticed at this point she was digging every little bit of change out of her pockets. Her bill came to $9.02 and she could only come up with $5.95. I watched for about 30 seconds as she had the manager void the items and put them back.
I don't ever carry cash on me so I knew I couldn't help. I was trying to figure out a way that I could pay for her items on my bill and then still give them to her. I developed a plan...and then I opened my wallet and for some reason.....there was $4.00 folded up nice and neatly in there. I had just gone to lunch with Chad and never noticed any cash in my wallet so I have no idea how or when it go there. I told him to put the items back on her bill and I gave her the $4.00. She said "No, I really don't need these items" and I said "It doesn't matter, please take the cash anyway". He rung them back up, she said thank you and she was on her way.

Chad didn't put the money in my wallet and I have no idea how it got there, but God does...and that's all that matters.

Not Recommended!

I do not recommend going back to re-reading blogs that I wrote from a year or two ago. I did this last night and became sad. Sad because it looks like something tragic is going on in my life. I don't really notice it that way but it makes me wonder if others think that. When reading, it sounds like it is just always something! I wonder why I don't notice it until I take the time to go back and reflect on my past writings.

I don't like complaining or whining and I always try to be that person that finds the positive in everything. Even a hang nail!

I guess I hope that when others see me....they don't see the down side. I hope they see my positive outlook on life.

So Theresa sent me a personality test and I think it explains me just perfectly! I just hope by now...people know their secrets are safe with me! ;o)

You Are An Exclamation Point

You are a bundle of... well, something. You're often a bundle of joy, passion, or drama. You're loud, brash, and outgoing. If you think it, you say it. Definitely not the quiet type, you really don't keep a lot to yourself. You're lively and inspiring. People love to be around your energy. (But they do secretly worry that you'll spill their secrets without even realizing it.) You excel in: Public speaking You get along best with: the Dash

What Punctuation Mark Are You?

When a day....is a good day!

Yesterday was a great day for me. I'm going to venture on and say it was amazing as I felt really great most of the day. (yes T...I said MOST) The day started out slow for me as I s-l-o-w-e-l-y cleaned my house. Theresa came to watch! ;o) But as the day progressed, and meds kicked in, I was able to make it through a recital, and a l-o-n-g night at work!

I have 19 more days until my surgery and I have to admit, the last week has been unusually painful and really quite debilitating. It was no picnic. But I'm not willing to let that stop me. I have a feeling that after this next week is over, I may collapse! ;o)

I was really taken out of my comfort zone in many ways. I had to ask others for help on certain things, rely on pain meds most of the time, had to postpone things with the kids, and really just lay on the couch during that time. None of that is my cup of tea. But I learned some really great lessons in it. By asking others to help, I feel like not only are they blessing me by helping, but they are blessing the Father in their work and service. I'm not always the best at delegating task but I did it and was overwhelmed by the response. My plate was overflowing, but now my heart is and I have time to spare.

This kind of service just doesn't come from church, but I notice it all around me. My friends at work have become like family to me. They are so gracious in their continuing love and support in whatever I am going through and whatever my future brings. They are not all Christians but the one thing that I hope they see is that Christ lives in me and that my service to others is a service that is pleasing to Him. Not because it's something I have passion about, or get a paycheck for...but because in everythng I choose to do in my lifetime, I do it for the glory of God.

Today is a very busy and full day for me and will be a long night at work again as well. I need sleep, but that will have to wait until Monday. ;o)

James 1:2-4
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

God's not nearly done working on me yet!

Media & Jesus

Terry Rush mentioned it in his blog about Jesus in the media. Ever since then, it seems like my eyes and ears have been drawn to find Him there more and more. But it hasn't been very difficult this week.
Just a moment ago, I saw a commercial for something called "The Lord's Boot Camp". I was interested enough to look it up.

Come to find out that this is a mission boot camp where third world countries are created to prepare teens for the mission field. They nurture orphans, build granaries, dig wells, and minister in such far-flung places as Tanzania, Mongolia, Indonesia, Belize, and Ukraine.

I will be interested to watch this special as it airs on Saturday, April 12 at 7:00pm.



Full Aritcle:
http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2008/february/28.60.html?start=1

2 NIGHTS IN A ROW!!!

Jesus in the media again!!! But this time...IT'S WITH THE RIGHT WORDS!!!
Way to go American Idol! And way to go Jesus!!!

American Idol does it AGAIN!!!

Twice now American Idol has brought our Father into the mix! In case you missed it...here is the closing song from night! There is big controversy this morning that edited out Jesus...but they didn't edit out Lord and I don't think it lost it's message!!!! I think with million of viewers watching...the message was clear! Even with the bleeping at the end of the show...which I'm sure they used for ratings....I still don't think it took away from the powerful message that was left by this song!

Blessed!!!

There is always something about life that excites me. The random hello on the street, a thoughtful note in the mail, and just random thoughtfulness.
I like those things. And just as much, I like to give them as well. Someone told me today at work that I am one of the friendliest girls she knows. "You say hello to everyone who passes by and you always smile"

My mind has been occupied with a lot of junk as of lately. But that's okay. There's good reason for that.
Even with junk in the way, we can always keep our chins up. Today was one of those days that really could just get ya down. Bless Chad's heart, he was just hit from every direction today and didn't know weather to look forward or behind. It was just a crazy day altogether.

Today I feel blessed! I feel so blessed in life. I am a rich woman. Richly blessed! ;o) So many things go on in life...who am I to complain. I have my share of hardships, but I also have more than my things in life to rejoice about.
Is it okay to be down and out??? Yep! Sure is. But I like the fun side of life and look forward to having fun regardless of the endeavour!

Thank you God for the life that I have! I couldn't be happier than I am today!

Random Favorites....

Cereal = Captain Crunch Berries

Drink = Diet Dr. Pepper

Restaurant = Olive Garden

Time of Day = Early morning...at sunrise

Day of the Week = Thursday

Childhood moment = Ice Skating and getting to be in Disney's Great Ice Odyssey.

Girly thing to do = Get a pedicure!!!

Place to be = On the couch with Chad

Hang Out Spots = Ice Cream Shops

Hot Drink = Hot Chocolate

Pie = Millionaire Pie

TV Show = Anything reality!

Toy as a kid = Holly Hobby Doll

Rock Star = Any big hair band from the 80's!

Vacation Spot = Dallas

My own Physical Feature = Eyes

Ever Wondered???

In case you have ever wondered who looks like who in this family.....here ya go!

Here you have Emilie at 2 years old and Me at 2 years old! Crazy!!!

memory lane

Now I'm having fun looking back and looking at life now.

Here Ian weighs 3lbs 1oz. He was really awake and alert for such a little guy. But all that we have come through, he has done so well. We have our moments...but overall I couldn't have asked for anything better!


He is growing up on us so fast. Pretty soon he'll be 18 and won't want anything to do with us. For now, I will be happy that he still loves to be around me!

Keeping with the theme

Well, I got quite a few comments last night at church about yesterday's blog. Chad was rather upset as I didn't post some of his favorite pictures. Must I say....I won't DARE!!! But as I come across some of the blast from the past, I guess it's okay to share with you. And just a little side note....for all of you my age....YES...YOU HAD BIG HAIR TOO!!! So don't even try to deny it!
The above pic was taken in March 1992 at this little place called Fromex inside Woodland hills mall. They had this booth where you go in and use a remote control to take your pictures. I think those were our first offical pictures we ever took together. It was a fun time as we created may fun poses behind the curtain! The next picture is us after we had climbed all the way up some huge cliff in Searcy and then climbed back down. It was a fun day. Needless today, we conqured the cliff.

#14

It's really neat to me to know that Chad and I have been married now for 14 years. This picture was taken on Chad's 21st birthday. (yes, we are skinny, and TAN!)
It's amazing over the years what life takes you through. The ups, the downs, the happiness, the sadness, and so much more.
Over this past year, we feel like we have embarked on a rather unusual journey together. Not necessarily the road we would have chosen to travel, but one that God has chosen for us.

We love eachother more today then I could have even fathomed 14 years ago. Sure, it was cute puppy love then...and really...it still is. One of the neatest things ever is that I think Chad and I have grown up together.

I can't imagine life without Chad. I can't imagine life without all the struggles that we have been through together. It would take just a lifetime to go through them all, and yet, we are not even close to being finished. I couldn't be happier than I am right now. We do everything together! We laugh together, cry together, get mad together, gain weight together, get sick together, get hurt together, make friends together, and the list goes on and on.

It's no secret how much I love him. He's my life. My love.

21 years of friendship!

Tisha and I met at the workshop 21 years ago. We've been the best of friends ever since. I can't imagine my life without her in it. Thanks Keith for capturing the moment!