The WILD Birthday Party

Okay...so if you know my aunt Cyndi...she can't do anything half way. So for Jordan's Birthday she had this animal guy come and bring his exoctic animals. You could ride the turtle! No joke! It was so cool. Then I thought I was being really brave by holding the snake...well...it no more got around my neck and I was ready for it to go away. The man was saying things like "Don't touch it's head...he doensn't like that" Well...the head was coming right for my face and I didn't know what to do. YIKES! But we had a great time!

More of our fun night!

The Graduation Party

Well we had a great time at the venue after we finished our PCT class. So yes...these people could very well be a part of your healthcare for you or one you love. Don't know if that looks scary or not. We had a blast. There was a great band there and we had a fun time just laughing and finally celebrating not having to study until school starts again in August. 11 of us were celebrating getting our new jobs and starting work. The night was fun and eventful!

First Day...HELLO MIGRAINE!

Today was my first day on the job and boy...it was a great experience. I can tell I'm really going to have my work cut out for me in the ICU. I met several supervisors and they were all so nice and ready to put me to work. And indeed they did. It ended up being a very busy and productive day!

I left after 8 hours with the most miserable migraine I've had in a long time. I'm trying so hard to keep myself away from OTC medications but I'm not so sure it's going to be easy. I need to get back in to see Dr. Breck before these pains start to get out of hand. He seems to cure all my aches and pains in my head. I had to miss VBS tonight to recoup from my ailment but now I'm feeling better after a little sleep this evening.

After I got off work today, I had the chance to swing into Bob Gardner's room for a bit. He's such a nice man. I pray after I left he got to go home and I won't walk in and see him tomorrow. But if so...I'll visit with him again. It's nice to see familiar faces at the hospital, but I'd rather not see them as patients.

You know...I have the best husband in the world. Even though he worked all day in the heat, he came right in the door...took a shower...and got the kids ready for VBS without even blinking an eye. He was even willing to work and take my spot with the second graders but Linda said they were fine on help. I am just so thankful to have him. Especially in a time of need. He's been through everything with me and puts up with so much. I truly know how lucky I am to have him. He's just so precious to me!

It's happening too quick!

I went to my last set of physicals this morning and I passed with flying colors. Although, I could have gone without stepping on the scale. Ugh...need to get back to the gym now that classes are over for the summer.

While filling out my paperwork, I thought I noticed a typo on them. It said I start on this Monday the 17th! What? Am I reading this right? And the lady said "Yes...you have to work full time for 2 weeks, M-F, 7am-3pm and then we let you go on your own." Wow!
Well...I was still overwhelmed with the date and then it hit me....BABYSITTER!!! What am I going to do with my kids? Ugh....I can't look at this as a delima. I'll figure something out.

So...I start Monday and will work M-F for the next 2 weeks and then they are letting me off to go to camp with my kids as a counselor and then on vacation with the family that next weekend and I'll go to my orientation on August 7th. After that, I'll be working weekends. So it looks like my last Sunday at church will be July 30th. I'm trying to find creative ways to make sure I can still take communion each week and have that moment with God. I want it to be an intimate moment and not just something I do each week to keep caught up. I don't want to lose that.

So in the mean time... I will be thinking of many creative ways to keep my spiritual energy up and connection with the chruch family. Everything will be good. God is going to use me in a way that I can't even imagine right now. I'm just looking forward to the opportunity to serve Him in another unique way and finding a way to bring someone closer to the same God that I love.

Good news...mixed emotions

After passing the class yesterday, I got a call this morning from Saint Francis and well..I GOT THE JOB!! My emotions are so mixed right now as I will lose my weekends for 1 year. I will find other ways to help others and minister on Sunday mornings in the ICU. I count on all of my friends to keep me connected.
My shift will be Saturday & Sunday 7am to 7pm. I will be on orientation for the next 3 weeks and I do not know what times as of right now. At the end of this month I will go to the camp with kids and then we are going to leave camp on Friday and get away with the kids and Chad for the weekend to spend some time together as a family. I think we will take them to Six Flags for a fun weekend.

My heart is so mixed right now. I am so excited for this opportunity but yet saddened about what I will miss each Sunday. Moreso, I think my heart wonders if others will forget about me. Surely not. Then how will this affect my children and husband. I should be rejoicing right now instead of thinking of all of the downsides.

I am excited...really! Guess I still have to get over all the shock and excitement of this week.

I PASSED THE CLASS!!! YAY!!!

Well this has been a rough 8 weeks but it was truly worth it in the end. Today was our last day of PCT traning and I made it! Yay!!! We had a huge pot luck afterwards to celebrate our success and also the retirement of our precious instructor Myrna and her assistant Billie. We were her last morning class and we gave both of them a great farewell party. It hasn't been easy by far but now I am able to work! Now only one more test! The Oklahoma State Board AUA exam. Once I pass that, I will be totally certified! These test are not easy by far so please say a prayer. I'll need it!

Birthday & Volleyball! FUN!!!

This day was SOOOO much fun. We had Ian's 11th birthday part at my parents house and about 2 hours into it, the adults decided to take over the pool for a game of water volleyball. I can't even begin to describe how fun and FUNNY this game really was. I must say, I think we were pretty good!!! Although, I don't know what is happening in the picture below other than I went for the ball and Carrie ended up hitting it. I totally look like I've been slaughtered at this point from being on the front line! But I love how Theresa is watching and waiting for her opportunity to either hit the ball...or laugh at me when I come back up for air! I think it is totally the second. It was a great day and Ian had the best time!! Even though he skipped out from the party to go with his gf to the movies! HUMMMM....! Thanks to Theresa for providing these lovely photos for me. I'll post some of mine later.

Pride, Selflessness, and Appreciation

Do you ever do something because you heart tells you it's the right thing to do? And then your heart hurts after you did it?

I did that today. Actually, something I was proud of at the moment when I did it. Made me feel good about who I am.

I asked myself first,"What is your motivation behind doing this?" My answer to me was...."Because it's the right thing to do!"

My next question was "Am I reaping any benefits from doing this?" The answer was no.

I asked myself..."What would Jesus do?" And I thought to myself for a moment....and proceeded with my decision. I think that is why it felt so good.

Now...in saying that, here I am, many hours later and my heart hurts. Not because of what I did...but because I want to be totally and 100% selfless. I don't feel selfish really....but I know that somewhere deep down in me...there is a part of me that is. There is that little devil in me questioning my good intentions. Why on earth is it doing this to me? I want to know I did exactly what I did for the right reasons and be okay with it.

Then there comes another word that is hard on me...Pride! In making my decision, I had to totally swallow my pride. That's not easy. Pride is a strong word.

There really are a couple of definitions for Pride:
A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect

Arrogant or disdainful conduct or treatment; haughtiness.

Now...I don't really like to think that I am that second one...but today I did have to lay aside my own dignity and self-respect for someone else.

The only way that I can stop and think about that is Love. I made a decision because I wanted to show someone love. This person may never know it, may never appreciate it, may never even realize what I did, but I wanted to do it so that they may find some happiness in their life. So I was willing to give up some of mine.

The part where I really struggled today is not appreciating myself for what I did. I allowed those other thoughts and old tapes to come into play and stopped realizing I did a good thing.

So in typing this, I guess my revelation in all of this is how to appreciate myself for the good things I do. I know God loves me and He appreicates me....that's all that matters!

More about that family night!

So this is my mother and my aunt Cyndi.
This is my sister in law Jessica...yes...he does my hair!!! And a great job too!!!
Here are the men of our family!
We have this thing about wearing the same shirts all the time. It's so hilarious.

Hominy, Hominy, Hominy

This is me and my brother.

This is me and my niece.
So this is family night out to dinner. Last night we all drove out to Hominy (about an hour away) to visit Yoana's dad's new restaurant. We had great service and great food. Not much to say about the town but we had a great time together.

Trees, and Limbs...

So this was the neighborhood after our last storm. I am just not getting around to geting the pictures up but you can see how bad the destruction was.

Baking Soda and Vinegar

It's truly amazing what children will do after watching the science guy on TV. Not that it's bad or anything, but my kids are now totally into expolding thing with the simple solutioin of baking soda and vinegar.

First it was Ian wanting to try it and at the first shot of the film canister skyrocketing into the air, he comes bursting in the door, to influence the other two. After a few tries, Emilie gets involved with the boys. Now....I'm sad to say that poor little polly pockets stand no chance up against my kids as they strapped little miss polly to the canister and up, up, up and away she went with a mighty explosion. I was so sad for her. But it was fun to warch. The kids now decide to get red food coloring and put it into the mix....yep...you guessed it. The visual affect of blood. Oi! What's a mother to do but sit back and enjoy the scenery. Eventually, we turned it into green food coloring and called it slime! That was much better.!

EKG, Lunch & Spirituality!

Today I had the pleasure of spending my day at Hillcrest. I was in the EKG department all day and it was a blast. I know that hospital forward and backward now and boy, did I ever get my exercise going from floor to floor. Before I knew it, five hours had passed by and it was time for lunch. Then after lunch, time to go home. It was a great day!!!
I was fortunate to be able to participate in part of the Hospital's "Lunch and Learn" series today. The topic covered was "Spirituality in the Medical Atmosphere". I was quite interested. Even though I have my beliefs on this, it was really nice to see the case studies completed and the research on what effect spirituality can have on a believing patient vs. non believing. Not saying they all believe in God, but most of them believing in a higher power. The mortality rates of patients who were prayed for vs the ones that were not prayed for was incredible. And even moreso those that prayed for themselves. But I was most intrigued with the power of prayer by intercession. The fact that there was a study compiled where patients did not know they were being prayed for specifically and their health increased tremendously. Now, do I doubt this? Absolutely not. I beieve that God works in all things. There were a couple of skeptics in the room that believed it was all by coincidence, but I do believe that when you ask, you shall receive and if these patients were prayed for and got better, then I think that was by God's doing. Doesn't matter weather or not the patient believed in the theory. The fact is that it happened. I'm glad we have a God that is big enough to handle my small prayers. Even when I, or anyone else think they are so overwhelming...He proves to me over and over that He will always prevail. It just works out better that way.

Missing my blog time

It's been a while....

So my PCT class has entered its fifth week and going strong. My home hospital is St. Francis and I'm loving it. I am finding this is truly my passion. I love the patients that I see each week and provide care for. Every day is a new person and a new story. Some good news, some bad news. But all in all, it's all the news of life and the way things happen. They may not always be the way that we planned them, but this is all part if a devine intervention. Everyone has different beliefs, but one thing is for sure, everyone wants to be loved and cared for.

The class alone is going well for me. It's not easy by far, but again, I like a challange. I'm not the best test taker, but I have found this class has motivated me to challange my test taking skills and make them better. Analyze them, break them down, and see how I can make the most out of each question. If only every test in my life were an essay test, I would have it made!!!

I was excited to meet with the nursing advisors this week and found out that I have met the requirements to apply right now for the nursing program and begin in January. I can't believe I have made it this far. However, there would be two classes that I would have to take concurrent with the nursing classes and I just don't think I want to add that onto my plate. I decided I'm not in that big of a hurry to finish that quick.
I see all these young girls really pushing themselves to the max with their classes. They are not enjoying themselves. Some are young and single, but most are young and married. Even with little children. Then there are those like me who are in their 30's and kids in school. I want that liberty to still be with the kids as they are growing up and enjoying them. Even though I'm in school, doesn't mean I can't enjoy this time too. This time is precious. I won't quit. But I won't over extend myself at the expense of my family life. School will always be here for me. And so will my family. But they get older by the minute and I want to be part of each second. Cause every second counts.

Wow...I'm exhausted!

Today was my first day of clinicals and boy...I never knew how exhausted I would be. I got up at 4:45am so I could be fully awake and fresh and at the hospital by 5:45am. I didn't realize how long it had been since I had worked an 8 hour shift. I went to pre-conference before going to the floor. I was excited and a bit nervous all at once. After arriving to the floor and meeting the staff of nurses and techs, I knew I was really where my heart wanted to be. I worked with 7 cardiac patients all day and kept very busy. It was such a rewarding experience. After my shift was over, I went to post-conference with my instructor and I can tell you, I was on that high! I even made the comment "I wish we could work 12 hours shifts." She just laughed!
By the time I got home, I started to wind down from all the hope of the day and wow...I was completely EXHAUSTED!!! I had no idea how tired I really was. Something so rewarding to me just drained me to the core. I came home and completely passed out!
So now the weekend is here and I will have to study hard all weekend for this upcoming test but I can't wait for next week clinicals. Yesterday made it all worth it to me. I know now, this is exactly what I want to do.

The smile keeps coming

So here I am today...walking into my second week of class...ready to take my quiz that I've worked so hard for and something hits me!!! I forgot to study an entire page! Woops! Now, these quizzes are not like simple little quizzes...they are the size of some test in my other classes. It's not just like a small 10 point thing...they are pretty big. So I'm worried. We've already had 3 of these and I've made 100% on every one of them. Now what am I going to do. You cannot make below an 80 at all or you have to come some other time and reatake it.

So I looked at the clock and saw I had 10 mintues to study for the quiz. So I take out my notes, and have at it. I'm trying everything in my power to relate every word I see to something in my brain so that I can somehow remember all this valuable information in 10 minutes. But how...there's way too much stuff here. Well...I just figure, I'll do what I know and pray on the rest.

So she hands out the quiz. Now..quiz right??? 3 PAGES and only 20 minutes!!!!

I decided to start with the stuff that I had just studied which was on the final page. I thought I was doing a pretty good job getting the answers right. Then we go onto the first two pages which are just lovely to look at. I complete it with a little time to spare so I can recheck my answers and I turn it over and don't look back.

There's no way I can pass this with only going over the materical 10 minutes before.

So we have to wait until we get home to see our score.

I pull it up and it says "100%" WHAT????? CAN THIS BE RIGHT? I couldn't be that lucky can I?

Well, I did know the material. I found it easier when I could relate what I was reading to a real life sceniaro and it worked. I took them out of their context and made them into my own and it made it much easier to remember.

I hope the actual test isn't that difficut but for now, I'm pressing on and I want to keep up this score that I have recieved each time. It's totally worth all this hard work. It's paying off too and I'm so excited!

Success!!!!

Well the fight is over. THE PIT BULL IS GONE!!! And so are the neighbors!

Wow...This has been an ongoing battle for me since we first encounterd the pit bull problem in our neighborhood in December of 2005. In short, my neighbors pit bull continued to jump the fence into our backyard and come after our dog and our children. So many laws were being broken I took the matter into my own hands. (thanks to my government class)

I found out so many laws were being broken and I couldn't just stand by in good faith and watch this happen. Especially when it was happening to me and my family.

After I filed many will file citations, many fines issued, court appearances, jail time for the owners, and a load of controversary in the neighborhood, the problem is solved. Our neighbors have now moved out and they are gone. YAY!

I started to think back to what our country would be like if Hamilton had never written Federalist 6. We would be at war with our neighboring states if we didn't have a constitution. Much like I was just with my neighbors in my own back yard. I LOVE the wording Hamilton uses to describe men in his writing..."men are ambitious, vindictive and rapacious." I mean really...I would think that Hamilton himself had met some of the people in my neighborhood.

He talks about how we need to have men who are ready to stand for us. Well educated men...Much like the representative Bill Martinson over district 5 for our neighborhood who oversaw this ordeal and took it head on. In my very short 32 years of life...I have never met anyone who was willing to show up at my home, unannounced and ready to talk about my rights and problems and ways to solve this. Someone that was willing to work with our neighborhood as a complete union to find a common and peaceful ground. I mean...That's what it's all about. Who really wants to be fighting with their neighbors?

Hamilton was a very passionate person in my opinion. His writings are really rare in unique due to his passion and commitment to his beliefs and convictions. All the Federalist papers are very passionate but this one absolutely hits home with me. I'm sure in due time, I will find out how other things in my life are affected by these great men who were much wiser than I can ever dream of being. I owe a debt of gratitude to these men for helping us become what we are today. United!!!!

Summer Class in Session YAY!

The summer is upon us and yet another new semester for me. I've been pretty nervous because I have heard how difficult this summer fast track course is going to be. However, I am almost finished with my first week and I am very surprised and happy with the PCT course. I won't say it is easy, but certainly takes a lot of time and prep work for everyday. There is not a moment that I won't be buried in books. I started out ahead so that I won't fall behind and that is truly a key to success. I am always one that wants to be on top of the game. I don't want to run along side and just keep my head above water, I want to succeed with overwhelming success.

This past semester turned out to be very difficult. I was successful in completing the classes but not without a lot of anxiety along the way. But who said that this was ever going to be easy? Ha! Nothing worth fighting for in this world comes easy.

I stop to think about if I was in a hospital, what kind of nurse would I want working on me? Would I want the one that took the easy road, or the one who dug deep within herself to make the best of who she is and what she was about to become. I want the one that is driven, motivated, and on fire about her job. I want one that is dedicated to her work as if it were her own family. Yep...I believe that's the kind of nurse I want to be when I finish.

Do you ever see success in your future? Dream about the future and what it will be like for you? I certainly do that everyday. I feel so motivated to get up each morning and face each day with a renewed sense of adventure. Each class I take has been an adventure and I love it. I haven't loved every class, but for the most part, this has really been a great ride so far.

So as I am completing my first week of an 8 week course, I look forward to the next 7 ahead. I've taken 3 quizzes already with absolutely perfect scores. I don't want to settle for anything less than perfection. Someone's life may be in my hands someday and I want then to know they are safe. That's just the kind of person that I want to be. Maybe not perfect, but certainly successful.

Bad day...and then relief

You ever just have one of those days where you just feel everything is going to go right and then everything goes worng? Well...this is my venting session so I'll warn you now. But it does have a good ending.
Today was the start of my PCT training and what I thought was going to be a busy schedule...is going to prove to be overwhelming. I don't want to count my eggs before they hatch....but when you go into the class and the first person they introduce you to is the psychotherapist....then you know you are in trouble. First words were "You want to get to know this lady"...holy cow.
So we go through 3 1/2 hours of all the information and we go to the bookstore to get our books and uniforms that were ordered...2 MONTHS AGO....and they are not in. I have to have 5 chapters read by Monday morning, but yet, they can not have the material??? I just don't get it!!! They knew sevearl months ago we would need textbooks by today...then why don't we have them. I think this is such a problem with the school. But yet, no matter what you do, who you complain to, you can't get anyone to listen. I spent most of my day seeing of I could locate the text book online somewhere to I could try to get it overnighted to us but yet...no luck. This is not a good way for me to start off the semester. Or any of the 50 students in class.
So then I get home to pick up the kids and find out that Ian was accused of being a liar by one of the teachers at school. Not only did she accuse him, she boldly told me that he did this and has no proof. Other than the other student is a "model" student and couldn't possibly ever do anything wrong. It was a very unprofessional conversation as she walked away from me before we were finished. It's not that Ian couldn't make up a story...Lord knows he's a 10 year old boy...but to say that the other student couldn't make up a story too is just obsurd.
I heard Ian's story and I truly believe him. He has never changed his story no matter how many times I ask and I don't believe he is lying.

I think the thing that bothers me is this. Just because Ian has problems, he has been stuck with a repuation since he was in Kindergarten. Is it fair? NO! How does anyone expect him to change? He works so hard to make a good impression and be a good boy, but then when he does, it seems to go unnoticed. I can't fight all his fights for him. I can't win this battle. I don't want to win. But I don't want my sons integrity deminished becuase of his past. That's like a person going to jail...doing 10 years of time...getting out...and then never being able to be forgiven for their past mistakes. I don't know maybe I am over analyzing this whole thing but at this point, I am just so upset for Ian.

Tonight at church...my heart was hurting so bad! You can tell this day had just gone wrong from the beginning. So we get there and all the chairs were set in small circles. So I knew...."Oh yeah...we're praying tonight" So we go to the front...cause I love to sit in the front...and we have people come sit with us that do not normally sit with us. That made me feel so good. Normally you go in and sit with your friends, or people from your small group, and that's so easy. Those people already know your junk. So tonight, here we are with new people...some we had to even introduce ourselves to...even though they have gone there for years....and the prayer time began. We had a great leader who started with a very good prayer and eased us into it. But when I started to look down...I just couldn't help but feel the tears run down my face. What? I didn't feel like I was crying. You know that feeling you get when you try to hold back the tears...well...I wasn't trying to hold back...I just bowed...and the flood came. I was able to open up and pray a what I believe was a very selfish prayer for myself and for the day that I had. Almost INSTANTLY I felt this release of negative energy come off of shoulders and I felt like a burden had been lifted. That's totally what I needed. I just needed to talk to God about it. I really didn't want to go to church tonight, but I had hopes there would be something there that would get me out of my funk and lift my spirits.

By the time we left, I felt like a totally different person. I walked through those doors tonight very hard harted and upset and came out with a sense of peace.

At least the day ended on a good note. I love days like this and must thank God for each of them.