Monday, February 26, 2007

Do you have a best friend?

This was one of the questions that came up in a recent survey I had to take at work.

"Do you have a best friend at work?"

I was happy that I could answer that question yes. But most of the time, it's not hard for me to make friends. I usually like everyone I meet and the more I get to know them, the more I truly just love them.

This question can pertain to so many different areas of life.
Do you have a best friend at work, school, home, the club, etc?

What makes a person a "best" friend? Are they the person that tells you anything and can trust you with that info? Are they the person that will hold you accountable even though you know it may hurt someday? Are they the person that will stand beside you or even stand up for you in a time of need?

I think in my lifetime, I've always had a "best" friend. It's not always the same person as people come and go throughout your lifetime.

What about teens and youth groups?
I remember my best friend growing up was someone I knew from church. This was a good thing. I know if I had hung out with the kids from school, I would not be where I am today. I had a friend that would hold me accountable for the things I said and did and she would remind me of what was right.

But right now, I see that some kids just don't like church. Why? Is it because they don't have that best friend? Someone who accepts them no matter who they are or how they act?
What do kids have in common right now? If they are happy, they are happy together. If they are mad...they are mad together.
I've noticed that children mimic the behaviors of their parents. If their parents don't like church, neither do they. If the parents don't like the youth minister, then the kids don't either.
What messages are we sending our kids today by our own unacceptable behaviors.
It seems we try so hard to get our kids to act the right way, and then there are parents who go and act just like children. How confusing right?

I remember the days when I went to summer camp with 250+ teens from Church of Christ across the state. I can tell you it was the BEST summer of my life. Especially for my freshman year. That summer shaped the course of my actions until I was a senior.
Why? Because it was at that time that I knew I could have best friends within the church. And it had nothing to do with my home congregation, other denominations, or anything else. I simply knew that from here to Chickasha, Oklahoma, I would have friends that I could count on.

I love having great friends from other congregations. I think it is the coolest thing that I can pick up the phone and know that I have friends from all over that enjoy talking.
I think kids need that too. I know our youth participate in the area wide "Night of Praise" and I think that is the coolest. We need more interaction for these kids now days.

I don't have a teen in any youth group, but next year I will and I'm worried for him. He's never had a best friend yet and he's 11!

I have a saying that I like to use often: "Don't complain about something unless you have a solution to fix it"

I have lots of ideas, maybe not solutions, but it all starts with a best friend.

When God is your ultimate best friend, you win!
When you have a Godly best friend, you win!
Everything else is just what you make it after that.
What will we do with this time that is left?

I don't know how or when but when I leave this earth, I want to make sure I've made a difference. I want others to know how hard I tried. I want to leave a legacy that others remember me by the good that I did, and the failures that I overcame.
I want to be able to make a difference in someones life. In the life of the old and in the life of the young.
I want to be able to have other's say "She was my best friend"


Dusty said...

Brenda, what camp and what year?

Brenda said...

Dusty~ It was at camp Pettyjohn. I think the year was 1988.Were you there????
It seriously felt like a million teens all crammed in one place! It was the year of the "Camp Crushes".

Dusty said...

Yes I was there. I was a junior that year. Who was the director that year? Was it Tracy Ellis?

I loved Camp Pettyjohn. I loved the air-conditioned chapel.

Who were some of your friends? What church did you come with?

Brenda said...

Yes, I do believe it was Tracy that was the director. You must have been one of the lucky ones that got to sleep in the chapel. I remember getting so many mosquito bites in that HOT cabin! But the whole week was totally worth it.
I came with Garnett that year. My friends then were Anji Wortham, Jennifer Warren, Heather McDonald...not sure if any of those ring a bell.
But I was friends with Gerald Goodson, Amy & Jason Bray (she wasn't bray then) Jodi Livinston, Stacy Mantooth, Jim McCool, Allison...can't remember her last name but her mom did the jewelry. um...I just can't think of them all. That was SOOO long ago. That was the best summer ever.

Dusty said...

How did we not know each other? Jason Bray was my roommate in college - my freshman year. Stacy and Gerald were good friends going back to early junior high years.

No, I didn't get to sleep in the chapel. I didn't realize people got to sleep there. I do remember some staying in tents! That was one overcrowded camp.

Brenda said...

I have no idea! I actually do remember you but not sure you remember me. Don't forget, I was two year younger...well...still am. ;o)
Jason and I went to Jr. Camp this past summer together as counselors and it was a lot of fun.
I've seen Gerald a few times here and there at different events. That's why I love workshop so much. Just one big reunion.
And you are right...that was one crowded camp! But out of all the camps that I ever went to, that is the one I would do over and over and over! I loved it. Having all those teens from all those churches for that long in one place was so much fun! Unfortunately, no other summer could ever match that one!