Thursday, October 02, 2008


Imagine my shock! I open the mailbox and there it is. A Homes and Land magazine with our house listed in it for sale! We don't even have a sign in the yard yet. And even better, it's listed on the Internet! Ugh! What to do? The house is not ready. I can't find time to get it done. I can't find a moment to breathe lately. The walls are sinking in fast. I have the supplies, the paint, everything. The hard work is done. The trim is taped off! It's ready to go. All I have to do is pour it in a pan....and roll it on. Sounds simple huh? Where do I find the time?
God sent an angel to call me last night. Tammy called and asked if she could put some time on her calendar to come over and paint. I don't have to be here, just leave it where she can find it and leave a key. My first instinct was to say NO. But the first thing that came out of my mouth was YES! It's so hard to ask for help when you know you really need it. We don't want to be needy people. But God designed us to lean on each other and to lean on Him. So what I am choosing to do.

Our lifestyle has changed drastically this year. Chad's hours cause us never to see each other. Communication with him has nearly ceased or has moved into the texting phase. If it wasn't for technology, I would not ever get the chance to talk to him. Guess I should be thankful for AT&T.

I find myself searching for adult conversation again. I haven't experienced that since my kids were toddlers.

3 months ago I decided to stop watching television totally. If it weren't for the kids, I would not even own one now. (okay...not is football season) But even with Football, I barely have time to take a glance at that. But I've noticed something. You know how much drama is on TV? Between sitcoms and the news, that's really all it is. So if you're not watching drama, well, you create it. And boy, did I ever know how to create drama. This is such a fault of mine! Maybe I should get wrapped up in those shows like desperate housewives (which I've never watched) or Grey's Anatomy or House or anything that gives me that fictional life that everyone dreams about. NOOOO! That's not the right thing!

In the little amount of time I do have, I have devoted about 30 minutes everyday to my own personal bible study. In three months it has been the most rewarding thing I have done and I love it. I have learned so much about myself by looking at my life and comparing it to someone in the Bible, a principle, or a law/commandment. Now...granted, that's not always good. What I have found out about me has not been great. Leading to being even more overwhelmed.

I've made some decisions in my life that haven't always been smart ones.
But today, I spoke to someone very encouraging who I believe is going to give me some hope for the future. I see a journey that I have been on which I call the path of destruction. I see a journey that I am embarking on that can only lead to me being closer with Christ. Recognizing that I am a sinner is the first step. How I deal with that is the next journey! Stay tuned!

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