I can't stay long....

My night at work reminded me of Terry's saying......I can't stay long....but on the contrary.......!

It was a very busy night. I was on the code team that evening and had 38 patients to see within a 2 hour window. My pager was going off left and right and I didn't have the time to get to everyone. I started down the list of who is the most critical and tending to them first. Others, unfortunately, would have to wait for the next rounds a few hours later.

I walked into a room in the ICU. He was just another patient for me to see at the moment and I was in a hurry. I told him why I was there, what I was going to do, and proceeded with my work. On the couch sat his wife, daughter, and son in law, and they just watched me as most family members do.

I gave him his meds and reached down to take his pulse. He grabbed my hand.

Me: "Are you okay?"
Him: "Yes, you're just different"
Me: "Okay, well what's different about me?"
Him: "You believe in God"
Me: "You are right, I do"
Him: "And you believe that he was with me"
Me: "Yes I do, and I believe He is with you now as well"


I had no idea why this patient was here other than he was recovering from a wound. I had no details at this moment.

Him: "Today is my birthday"
Me: "Well, happy birthday" (it wasn't really his birthday, but if he wanted to believe it....then I am willing to let him)
Me: "So....how old are you?"
Him: "I'm brand new" .....and a single tear ran down his cheek.

"You see, I was taking a walk and I had gone down to the creek where I normally hunt. I frequent there quite a bit. I had my shot gun with me because you never know what you'll see around there. It's my place of comfort. I don't get cell phone reception, there's no technology around. It's just me. I'm all alone.
I was walking along and heard a noise. I turned around, but saw nothing. When I went to walk again, I tripped on a rock and fell on my gun. It shot straight through me in the abdomen. I never lost consciousness and remember all of it very well. Once I realized what I had done, I reached for my cell phone and called my son in law. Amazingly, the phone worked. He had gone hunting with me several times so I could tell him where I was. He stayed on the phone with me the entire time as he was leading EMSA to me on another phone. As I laid there, I didn't know what to think. I hadn't been a faithful christian for a few years. My son died two years ago and I have never been able to forgive God for that. It hurt me so much. But I remember laying there and asking God to just give me one more day. Just one more day to make things right here on earth and then I'll go. That was 10 days ago. Today is that day. Today is the first day I can remember. Today is the first day I realize what happened. Today is the first day of my new life for him. A chance to start over. A chance to forgive. A chance to get my life right with Him and for Him so that I can spend eternity with Him and my son."

Me: "Wow! Thank you for sharing that with me"
Him: "He told me I had to. As I laid here before you walked in, He told me you were the one"
Me: "Which one?"
Him: "The one that needed to hear this today"
Me: "I wonder why?"
Him: "Because you're scared"
Me: "Me? Scared? Of what I wonder"
Him: "Only you and God know"

I was pretty much speechless at that point. We are trained to just listen and not give our opinions. (that is a work ethic....not my beliefs at all)

When my examination with this patient was completed, I left, in tears. He was right. I have some fears right now. I think we all do. That could have been anyone scheduled to walk in that room at that moment and they may have heard the same story. But I know this......I don't ever simplify something that God is trying to communicate to me. Via the Bible, a song, a friend, or a patient. If we trust in the Lord with all of our hearts and never lean on our own understanding of things that are of this world, there is no fear to be had. With God, all fears are gone.
So I am thankful that this man lived and will be a living testimony to those that he encounters. I am thankful for whatever reason, God sent me to him that night.

And as for how long I stayed......I was scheduled to stay 8 minutes. I stayed 45 minutes. And not once during that time did my pager ever go off. hummmmmm