Today I found a part of me that I don't like. It's called Anger. And it usually only comes around when I'm not feeling well and when it attacks, it heads straight for my heart.
I have a few areas I need to work on in my life and this is one. I don't get angry very often. Now....I do get upset with things....but I'm talking all out anger. The kind where you blood pressure rises to numbers that exceed the scale. You explode! You yell! You say things you don't mean! Yep....that was me. Sheesh. I don't like that person and I pray that God gets rid of her.
Eph 4:26-27 says "In your anger do not sin" Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,and do not give the devil a foothold.
I had to make some apologies that were very difficult. But it all turned out very well in the end. I just hope that I can remember how I felt today and the next time I get angry, I choose something different.
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I love you. I know that doesn't fix anything, but I want you to know that it's true. Because sometimes, when we're in that moment of anger and the side of us that even we ourselves don't like shows up, we need to know that even in that dark, not-so-pretty moment, we are loved. So, even though it doesn't actually solve or fix anything, let your heart be comforted and reassured in the knowledge that you are loved. By me. By God. And by so, so many others. No matter what.
Thank You Lindsay. You know what I dreamed yesterday? I dreamed that I wish God had just taken his arms, wrapped them around me and told me just to SHUT UP! I needed to be silenced and it didn't happen. But in that I know He wants me to have self control and that is something I have to do on my own. I have faith in Him that I can and will be better. I saw a side of me yesterday that I haven't seen in 15 years and I don't ever care to see it again. But thank you so much for loving me like you do. You are an amazing friend and I can always count on you for love and hugs! :o)
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